A funny anecdote from the week we spent at Silver Birch Bible Camp...
Walter and I jumped into the speed boat at the Bible Camp to help take kids for tube rides during the waterfront time.  The sun was gloriously hot and the lake was smooth and perfect.  Firing up the boat's motor, we pulled away from the dock to just make sure the boat was running well before tying on the tube and preparing for our first batch of eager children.
The three young girls wanted a "medium speed with no donuts" ride, so Walter gently revved the motor and pulled them at their desired speed.  A second boat was also taking kids for tube rides, so we were able to maximize the kids' opportunities to get their turn during the hour and a half activity time before supper.  We took the girls for their turn, pulling back up to the floating dock to switch kids.
The next round started off just fine; we pulled out towards the centre of the lake to allow the other boat to pull up to the dock area.  Then our boat sputtered.  Walter turned off the ignition and pulled and pushed knobs.  He started it once again but it didn't stay running.  He got up to check the motor.  Upon examination, he found a small black plastic piece broken off the fuel line.  The fuel had almost completely emptied from the tank in those few moments and the piece was not reparable. The girls in the tube were splashing and signalling to go but we were able to communicate to them that we were stuck.
I gazed at the shore, then back to the two paddles in the speed boat.  Sigh!  Looks like we'd be paddling!  We tried waving to the driver of the other boat but they were too far away.  So we began to paddle.
As I checked behind to see how the "tubers" were getting along, I was more than amused at what I saw:  they were singing at the top of their lungs, mock-paddling.  And what were they singing?
"I will trust the promise He will carry me...
safe to shore,
safe to shore,
safe to shore,
Safe to shore!"  ~  "My Lighthouse" by Rend Collective
This was an upbeat song we had been singing in the chapel worship times!  The kids had made the best of an unfortunate situation and applied their spiritual knowledge in a practical way.
And by the way, the other speed boat driver eventually saw us in distress and towed us safely back to shore.

I am learning more about faith and trust than I thought possible.
Just when I think I have been tested and know God has carried me through, we go through more challenges and deeper testings.  And I am learning that God goes deeper still.
On Sunday morning, the youth pastor leading the "Evidence" team from Calvary Memorial Church in Racine, Wisconsin, shared the opening in our service at Healing Hearts in Regina.  He has only been to our worship services once each summer for the past 7 or 8 years so Pastor Ethan isn't all that familiar with how our openings usually go...but that doesn't matter.
I heard God in that opening.
Pastor Ethan asked us the question:  which attribute about God is the most important or basic to His nature that makes Him God?  We all contributed answers like love, tenderness, mercy, forgiveness, justice, holiness...and these are all qualities that are godly and true.  But the underlying attribute he wanted to bring forth was God's "Immutability", that He never changes.  I hadn't thought about that in terms of how every other attribute would not remain true about the Lord if He changed.  If He was like the humans He created, He would change His mind, change His moods, change His actions and directions.  We could never really know Him or trust Him if He was in constant states of change!
The undeniable truth is that God is always loving, always tender, always merciful, always forgiving, consistently just and holy.  He will never be the opposite.  God is the same, always.
     *****          *****          *****
I didn't know how hard today would be.  On the way across town following Dewdney Avenue from the east end to the west, I felt almost sick to my stomach with nervousness.  What would we learn at the cancer clinic today that was any different than the information we have already heard?  I couldn't explain my  anxiety at this appointment;  we hoped to find out more details and a date as to when Caylea's treatments would start.
As the date was set for August 15 and the oncologist and nurse gave us more specifics about the treatments and especially the side effects, I felt floored.  Walter, too, was blown away by the less than perfect success rate of the Interferon treatment regimen.  It is still a new treatment and Caylea is not in the average age or health bracket of the statistics.  So we left the office feeling somewhat relieved to have dates; we also felt more overwhelmed at the first month's challenges and the subsequent year-long journey.
We got home and Caylea had things to do to prepare for a wedding this coming weekend.  She had been tearful when we had been alone in the oncologist's office, but overall, she said she was relieved to get going soon with the treatments.  She just wasn't looking forward to feeling sick for a prolonged period of time!  I totally don't blame her!
While she was occupied with her stuff, Walter and I were in shock and trying to recover.  I sent e-mail updates and made phone calls.  Walter worked in his garage.
Here I am now at the end of the day, taking time to reflect, and I am struck that God can do this!  He is Almighty God, El Shaddai.  To quote an author of a Bible devotional,
"What if God were good but weak?  Beautiful but powerless?  He might want to bless us but be unable to.  Wouldn't this God of good intentions be a bit pathetic?  Would any of us fall on our faces before Him like Abraham did when God revealed Himself as El Shadday?  Would we even bother to pray to such a God?"  ~  Ann Spangler
So our God is unchangeable.  He is all-powerful, Almighty, full of love and mercy!  He can bless us!  He is the same God whom Abraham bowed before, whom Moses met on the mountain, whom Jesus called upon in His darkest hours.
I needed those words Pastor Ethan shared yesterday morning.  I needed them today.
I will hold on to them as we anticipate August 15.

Another week has slipped by and the summer continues to fly!
The insurance details and plans to rebuild the burned woodshop for the ministry of "Healing Hands", the branch of Healing Hearts that seeks to equip young folks with some life skills, are progressing.
The "Evidence" students from Calvary Memorial Church of Racine, Wisconsin, finished 5 days of kids club in north-central Regina this past week.
We hosted Walter's sister Amy, husband Randy and their two sons, Andrew and Aydan, for a few days.  They became part of our appointments and Roughrider game party over the course of their visit.  Life didn't slow down because we had company!
Tomorrow is church and we will give a special plaque of appreciation to the Racine team for their faithfulness over the past 23 years.  This is likely their last missions seminar with us and we have been so blessed and greatly impacted by their part in Healing Hearts' beginning and growth.
What lies ahead?
Caylea has an appointment at the cancer clinic on Monday morning ~ the month  of August may become in sharper focus as we receive detailed information about Caylea's upcoming treatments.
Next weekend we will attend Kristina & Michael's wedding in southern Manitoba, then Walter will speak in their church on the Sunday.
As I still my mind and bring my thoughts captive tonight before sleep, I read a daily devotional that was based on Psalm 91.  It brings me great comfort as I anticipate another busy week...
"Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
  will rest in the shadow of the Almighty."

Oh, how I long for that rest!  I think of the heat of summer, the overwhelming reality of my life right now and I yearn for the sweet shade and cool breeze in our back yard.  I do find peace and rest as I enjoy that refreshing place physically; how much more is the satisfying rest in the shadow of the Almighty God, my Father!
Tonight I will lay it all down and let God take care of my burdens, my family and all that lies ahead.

All I can say is PRAISE THE LORD! 
Once again, God has shown Himself faithful and true.
We had a blessed week at Silver Birch Bible Camp.  Walter spoke his heart out - and lost his voice!  I was able to participate by playing guitar for the chapel worship times, help set up and take down chairs, hang out with kids at whatever skills and waterfront opportunities I could!  But mostly I tried to pray, especially for Walter as he spoke, and for the kids' cabin devotion times.  Praying is more labour  than you think; I found myself easily distracted and tired when I simply wanted to pray over these spiritual aspects of  camp.
And I found the Lord so good to me, to us, as we had wrestled with leaving Caylea behind...she seemed to keep herself busy and involved in good things.
The praise highlight of our week was that at the surgeon's follow up appointment on Friday( when Caylea's friend accompanied her to that appointment) the results were that of the 31 lymph nodes removed, there was NO SIGNS OF CANCER!  When I got the text with this news, tears immediately sprang to my eyes and I gave thanks to the Lord!
Here it is now, Sunday night, and Walter and I are still recovering from the exhaustion of the week.  But what a privilege to know and trust in our God who is so kind and merciful!  He gives us the courage to face fearful things, He carries us when we have no strength, He blesses us with prayerful friends and family!  I am overwhelmed tonight as I quiet my heart.
I say good night to you all and close with a verse from Romans 1:7 ~ "Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ."

And we're off...
I have continued to wrestle it out with the Lord - and myself -  about traveling and leaving Caylea at home.  Thankfully, she has recovered well from her surgery just over a week ago.  She is still favouring her right arm and has some soreness and numbness from the incision both up her arm and down her side.  So technically she can survive at home and do the basics.  Daniel is away instructing at a Kids Curling Camp in Nipawin for another couple days, so Caylea is truly alone for part of our time away.
This is only a short stint.  In August, Walter and I have had plans to travel to the Maritimes for about a year now.  We will spend some time with Mark & Amy as they are already just outside St. John, New Brunswick at the Hampton Bible Camp.  They will take us around to some of the tourist spots and we can stay in their guest accommodations.  But that will be about a 10-day period, possibly during the initial month of Caylea's treatments.
Is that a good time to be away?
My heart is torn because I would feel terrible to cancel out on our plans with Mark & Amy!
So early this morning, I was reading my Bible and praying, journaling the dialogue between myself and the Lord.  I was able to cast my cares on Him and not be plagued by worry throughout the day.  It seems I have to do this quite frequently!  Fortunately, I saw how David in the Psalms had to come to God often, as well!  He voiced some desperate and dark emotions, wrestling with evil and enemies and endless battles.
I cling to David's declaration at the end of Psalm 55 ~ "But I will trust in You."
That's it.  Simple.  Trust in my God.
He will take care of Caylea, her needs, her journey, her health, her state of mind!
So the bedding is in a laundry basket, our bags our packed and some snack foods are sitting on the kitchen counter, ready for our road trip to Silver Birch Bible Camp near Loon Lake, Saskatchewan.  Walter has his Bible stories, his object lessons and a continuing missionary biography all ready to go as he will be speaking at the children's camp for 5 days.  I don't have a specific role but there are always ways to help out and serve at camp!
In the meantime, Caylea has some plans in place for her time at home...including a friend to accompany her to her surgeon's follow up appointment on Friday.
She's in Your hands, Father!  She's Yours!
Until next weekend, I don't imagine I will have access to the internet to enter another blog.  So God bless each of you and enjoy the summer of 2016!

Day of rest.
I am so relieved to just have a day of worship, rest, eating leftovers and not have any responsibilities.
At church this morning, it was nice to receive ministry, to sing and praise.  I found myself in tears by the end of the music, sitting down and just listening to the words of the song "Surrender".  Pastor Bob had shared how surrendering to Christ is the laying down of our pride.  I realized my emotional place today was partly the struggle with my pride.  I did not want to admit I felt tired, a little worried, weary of the ongoing journey with Caylea's illness and the surgeries and anticipation of treatment for a year!  I sat on the chair in the back corner of our simple sanctuary and surrendered ALL to Jesus.
Wiping my tears, I just let the Lord wash over me with His presence.  It wasn't a big crisis. Walter whispered to me "Are you all right?"  And I replied, "Yep, I think so."  "Just needed a good cry?"  I nodded.
A few minutes later, after the announcements, was our traditional sharing time.  I raised my hand and Edward brought the cordless mike.  Without any practiced speech or prepared Scriptures, I just shared what I was feeling.  I praised the Lord for His answers to prayer for Caylea's surgery and restored health so far.  And I admitted my pride, my desire to be strong as a Mom.  But my very real weakness and weariness and my tears in church!  Bob reflected back to me that it was OK and I was being strong for my daughter.  But being weak is also real strength and I was doing a good job as a Mom. That felt so reassuring.  To be accepted and heard when I felt so unable.
This afternoon, our family is relaxing in the family room, watching baseball and each one of us on a laptop or device.  No need for deep conversation; no expectations to entertain or engage each other.
Just be together.
I read in I Timothy 4 a verse that has stuck with me.  "For to this end we toil and strive, because we have our hope set on the living God, who is the Saviour of all people, especially for those who believe."  I had been thinking of the verse in Psalm 42, referring to seeking the "living God" and looked up other verses using that phrase.  It was no surprise the idea of setting our hope on the Lord, because knowing our God is alive and active and involved means we can have hope.  My heart is lifted as I think of God not slumbering nor sleeping, watching over our every moment of life, He is not an inanimate object, a statue or idol.  He is the giver of life, the Creator of all that exists.  He can give life and heal because He is eternally alive.  The rivers of living water flow from His throne, His presence.
So today as I rest, I will set my hope on the "living God".  He will restore my soul.

Caylea had her second surgery yesterday, June 30.  All went well.  She said it seemed longer to be put under this time.  She mentioned to the anesthetist that she had trouble with nausea after coming out of surgery last time, so they began the Gravol earlier and she experienced less/shorter duration of nausea this go around!
Walter and I had the post-op procedure down smooth-I went up to the Day Surgery ward and went through Caylea's discharge.  She was already dressed and had downed her popsicle by the time I arrived.  Walter waited down in the drop-off spot in front of the hospital and we wheeled down.  I texted the group of family who were waiting news and the replies started coming in...
I had the "recovery recliner" prepared for Caylea and she settled in right away to rest.
Walter's sister Karen, and her husband Bob arrived mid-afternoon.  They had planned to come this July 1 long weekend and we saw no reason to change those plans.  So they quietly greeted Caylea and then we prepared a BBQ burger supper.  The evening's entertainment was to visit and watch the Roughrider home opener football game.

*****
To switch gears, I want to write about some thoughts I've had while reading through the book of Acts.  As Paul and Barnabas were sent out in chapter 13, I can relate to that call.  I remember clearly the steps I went through to become a missionary.  I prayed and sought God's will.  I went through other options and listened carefully to the visiting missionaries at Bible College.  I felt a growing impression of the needs in the world and the compelling strategy that God calls US to be His witnesses...the Scriptures seemed to jump out at me that pertained to missions, ministry, the Gospel message itself and I sensed that personal challenge to me:  what was I going to do about this Great Commission?
I was willing to go as a single woman.  The mission I was interested in applying to would send single ladies (partnered together) to communities and I was excited at the possibilities to reach out to the lost!  I finished my Bible School program with a Pastoral and Missions certificate.  I had student loan debt to repay so I knew I would need to work a couple years to pay that off before joining a mission.
Although my parents weren't exactly sure what I was heading into, they watched as I got involved in a local Native ministry in Regina, helping with Sunday School and music.
As the Lord would have it, I wasn't to remain single!  Walter was finishing his final year at Nipawin Bible College.  He had also gone on a summer missionary program in northern Manitoba (I went in 1985).  His calling was more into camp ministry initially, but he also grew in his calling to preach and counsel.  He followed me to Regina, where we both got more involved in the local ministry and built friendships within the First Nations community.  It seemed expedient to stay in the urban environment as many First Nations were moving into the cities for work and education and resources.  The Lord called us together.  We applied to NCEM while we were engaged and began to raise support and prepare for full-time ministry right after we were married (1989).
I remember the leadership of Crossroads Community Church laying hands on us and sending us off into the mission field of Regina, Saskatchewan!  Young, in love, full of vision and enthusiasm and answers (ha ha! How wise we were back then!).  God led us in spite of ourselves.
There was opposition to our ministry right from the beginning.  Just as Paul and Barnabas faced spiritual warfare, we faced various attacks against our marriage and our ministry.  At the same time, we learned how to battle and overcome, how to remain one and recognize the enemy's tactics to divide and conquer!  And the Lord blessed us with friendships that we still have to this day with coworkers and those we met and discipled in our early years.
We didn't experience the physical opposition nor suffer and fear for our lives to the extent that Paul did.  We have not faced prison for sharing our faith in Christ!
This is what I prayed for and continue to desire:  "And the disciples were filled with joy and with the Holy Spirit...and there they continued to preach the gospel....they returned...strengthening the souls of the disciples, encouraging them to continue in the faith.  And when they had appointed elders for them in every church, with prayer and fasting they committed them to the Lord in whom they had believed."  (chapters 13 &14)
This is what we do!  We aren't church planting in Regina anymore; we have leaders appointed and they are carrying on the local ministry.  Now we travel and encourage leaders in various places, supporting and giving counsel and providing administrative resources to empower their ministries.  And just as Paul and all the Apostles faced doctrinal and practical struggles, with culture and other factors working in the Gentile communities, we too face these challenges and pray for God to give us His wisdom for every situation.  (Chapter 15)
A sad portion in the book is where Paul and Barnabas parted ways for a time.  We also have had to part ways with ministry partners and that is probably the most difficult and heart-wrenching aspect of our work.  We don't always get along or agree with everyone in the ministry!  But we pray that we will be faithful to God's calling, kind and gracious when disagreeing and humble when going different directions.
We also recognize and enlist workers for the Gospel (Acts 16) such as Timothy, Silas, John Mark) and that is probably the most exciting aspect of our new focus these days.  Our focus in NOT to seek out to recruit.  But as we are going, as we are traveling and meeting people in churches and Bible colleges, there are believers ready and willing to serve and just waiting for the right opportunity to present itself.  We get to know them and hear their heart.  We build relationship and then consider extending the invitation to work together.  Its not built on resume and educational achievements. Character and call and commitment are the qualities we look for...it seemed Paul and Barnabas looked for those same qualities and took young proteges under their wings to disciple and train like "interns", which we encourage in Healing Hearts.
Its been cool to read the accounts of Peter, Paul and others as the Gospel was being introduced to new regions and people groups.  We in the 21st century are still on new frontiers and the same Gospel can still change lives!