I've been reading "Emotionally Healthy Spirituality" by Peter Scazzero, a pastor of a huge congregation in New York City.  Some of his book is basics I have heard before.  I felt like the beginning was pretty elementary and I wanted to get to the meat of the issues.  Well, when I hit a chapter entitled "Journey through the Wall", I felt like I had actually hit a wall!  I could see myself and many others as at that stage in our life's journeys.  I know I've hit walls before and had a measure of success in working through my fears, or anxieties, or blocks that were there.  But many of us have more than one issue to face...and I could really relate to this chapter.
Then I coasted along through some other chapters and could agree with the premises of looking back in order to move forward.  Many of Peter's applications are very practical.  Dealing with grief and loss.  Learning to face conflicts and not be false peacemakers.  Listen, communicate clearly, don't make assumptions about others, be realistic about expectations on ourselves and others.
The author also wrote about the practices of Sabbath and Daily Office for personal rest and spiritual connection with God.  This coincided with the book I had read earlier this year, "The Rest of God" by Mark Buchanan.  We need to be emotionally healthy in order to be spiritually mature.  And we need to practice spiritual disciplines in order to become mature and maintain emotional health.  It makes sense.
The main goal in seeking to be emotionally healthy and spiritually mature is to honour and love God.  The second goal is like it, to love and relate to others well.  Sounds just like Jesus' words to the Jewish man who asked which commandment was most important...Matthew 22:37-40.
A couple of meaningful quotes the Pastor Scazzero includes in his book are from some spiritual greats we may be familiar with:
"...loving one person at a time." ~ Mother Theresa
"Love is..."to reveal the beauty of another person to themselves..." ~ Jean Vanier
We can measure a person's maturity by how well they love.  An infant is very self-focused, loving himself most and not really concerned with others' needs or wants. A child will have some awareness of others and try to relate to others in as much as they meet their needs.  An adolescent is still often preoccupied with himself, defensive and poor in dealing with conflict.  But the adult - emotionally - will be able to communicate clearly what they need, be able to listen to others' struggles and be caring and respectful.  They can resolve conflicts, stay in relationship with others, take responsibility for their own thoughts and feelings and not use people for what they can get but can have mutual give and take with an appreciation for who the person is.
The truth is, "people may be, chronologically, forty-five years old but remain an emotional infant, child or adolescent."  (page 178)  I don't want to stay in any of those stages.  I can see a lot of myself in the adolescent stage yet and it's a little embarrassing to think I am not as mature as I'd like others to think I am!
I have a couple more chapters to finish and some exercises in the appendix section.  Hopefully this book and what I am learning can be a useful and helpful tool as Walter and I seek to coach and encourage our staff with Healing Hearts Ministries, Inc. in becoming all they can be in Christ!